Wednesday, January 15, 2014
The End. Really this time. You leave me no choice
Idk how many times IVe said its officially over i barely believe myself anymore but he has left me no choice. he did respond today and it just got worse and worse. he was just a complete asshole. threw everything in my face back on the why are you here shit likereally. said he wont change why dont i get it all he cares about is himself and he has a very strict morning schedule so we cant hang out? and that he likes to do everything alone its not just me its everybody he just likes to do it all alone. and he was like why dont you understand and i said youre the one that doesnt understand. but i do. you wont have to worry about me anymore and he sayd thanks. REALLY? and i left it at that. like you leabe me NO choice i decided then and there i wasnt going to talk to him but i knew the way he blew up on me he literally was like then why the fuck are you still blah blah cussing and shit. absolutely not. hes never talked to me that bad before though hes come close right before he came back last time. he was going to be scott free. happy. guilt free like always. but this. this will eat him up. and im happy. i know it because like half an hour later or an hour later he was like we are not enemies. we are friends. and i will always talk positively about you if anyone brings you up just wanted to clear that up and i was like GOTCHA BITCH. hell no. so i said brilliantly: "Corey did you read what you just said to me before you sent it? Do you hear how you talk to me? You had a choice and you made it. Im glad you'll talk highly of me as you should and i do of you though now i might just have no comment. Friends dont do what youvedone they care about eachother and if you want me to let you think that just so you dont have to feel how the person youve decided to be should feel, i wont. Thats just part of the package. You said you would deal with the consequences. No need to pretend it matters when it doesnt. You and me are VERY different. oh its crystal clear now. Im serious as a heart attack and i wont lose a wink of sleep sayin it. We may not be enemies. I dont have any enemies. But we are not friends. In any sense of the word. And we never will be again. So dont even entertain that idea in you head." DAMN IM GOOD WITH WORDS. Fuck with me nigga you got nooooooothin and will NEVER be able to do it how i do. And i did it without being mean. Seriously. I know I wont get what I wanted. I see that now. hes not who i thought he was but its ok im confident because I know Im innocent here and God has my back he has effed up and God will prosper me in his stupid name. I have no doubts now. I know this will bother him. Cause I know how he is. He thinks hes a good person. And it will bother him that he is to blame and did such a good person wrong and that i want nothing to do with him and have just cause. he got what he wanted yes but i know this wont be the last time he thinks about it and he will have regrets not me. theres no doubt in my mind. doesnt matter what he does doesnt matter if he moves on doesnt matter. the way he is going about things is retarded and i pity him because i cant see things working out with that mindset. WHO does that. only him. so fine. keep your issues. I WILL move on. right now im going to work on me and focus on my goals and my happiness and my spiritual growth and you will never ever ever be important to me or have any power over me again. and I will not speak to you. I dont want you I dont miss you youre an asshole. i dont want to cry anymore i dont care. no more wasting time on it im going to pretend i dont know you. honestly i dont. i dont know you i dont get you i dont need you and i dont want you. i want to move forward. my heart will heal and i will be okay but you just threw away the best thing that ever happened to you so it doesnt matter if its today tomorrow or a year from now you WILL feel it. and the tables will turn. steak and potatoes on my side. its whatever. me i gotta get back on my grind. i have a degree and some trophies to get. tunnel vision mode. goals only. FUCK YOU. YOU ARE SCUM. honestly. so mark this as the day. 3 days after the 5 month aniiversary of the day all this bullshit got started. one month from valentines day. things are officially over between us. forever. i will not speak to you no matter what you say. unless you express a desire to fix what you broke and a sincere remorse and value for me, nothing. i dont care what you say whether its mean or nice. i will ignore every single bit.
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